MAKING A WORLD OF DIFFERENCE - SINCE 1982

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Epitaph to an Outstanding Estate Agent

We are all most fortunate to either live, or spend our holidays in the wonderful Canary Islands. We enjoy the finest climate in the world - without exception and we have no dangerous animals or insects to spoil our enjoyment.

Sadly we have to face reality all too often in this island paradise and under these circumstances we realise that we are all human, we are not immortal and none of us are perfect.

We heard quite recently of the untimely and tragic death of a well-known estate agency proprietor who had for many years been a prominent figure in the profession and was internationally renowned for his business transactions with overseas investors and residents.

He passed away suddenly but peacefully and will be greatly missed by all who have known him, both personally and professionally.

We are however delighted to be able to pass on hitherto unknown information regarding this gentleman and his demise which has never before been made available to the public.

Reliable sources have advised us that upon his ascension to Heaven he was personally greeted by St Peter who asked in which direction he would prefer to turn for infinity - Heaven or Hell?

Not wishing to make any hasty or irrational decisions our trusted friend asked if he could first be allowed to see the options personally before making the ultimate choice.

After disrobing, showering and dressing in a white silk gown, he was firstly taken to view Heaven. The huge door slowly opened to reveal a room in which the entire inhabitants were kneeling, praying, chanting and wailing in pity and praise for their mortal sins and their saviour.

After studying the situation he was taken to view Hell. Behind this door he saw frenzied dancing to deafening music, plentiful food and drink and many beautiful girls beckoning him to join them.

He was in fact given a great deal of time to make his final choice but his decision was quickly made.

He was asked if he would reconsider the options. However, he would not change his intention - to go to Hell.

Eventually he was led into another waiting room whilst everything was prepared for his ultimate entrance. When the moment finally came he could not contain his excitement as he was summoned to the habitation of his choice.

The door opened, he was delivered inside but to his absolute horror he heard agonising screams and saw poor tortured souls who were enduring terrible pain and suffering.

He tried to leave. The door was solidly locked but after banging, shouting, scratching and pleading he was eventually attended by his captor.

"This is not what I wanted! This is not what you showed me!" he screamed in utter despair. The answer came swiftly. "Of course not, that was the show apartment"!